Monthly Archives:May 2014

Memorial Day Weekend

Your #1 Fan post on May 28th, 2014
Posted in Camping, Friends, Fun Activities, Novalie, Sunshine

Novalie had herself a fun three days.

slip n slide

An alllllllll day playdate.  The slip n’ slide is back in business.

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Another alllllll day playdate.  They made $38.

Sunday we went to my sister’s ward to hear my nephew play the piano in sacrament.  It was awesome and he is talented.  It made Novalie want to keep up with piano and practice more.

campiong

We set up the tent in the backyard to have our own little camp out.

clue camping

We played Clue.

snmores

smores

We had smores.

camping

Waking up in the morning.  We survived the night.  I didn’t sleep much, but it was fun.

Monday we ran some errands and had operation clean the living room.  Then Novalie had an afternoon playdate.  It made me really excited that summer vacation is just days away.  I love that girl.

She slept really really well all weekend.  And she has rosy cheeks that are turning very tan.  Love it.

This Moment in Time

Your #1 Fan post on May 23rd, 2014
Posted in Novalie, This Moment in Time

I want to remember how each night we play a game of Clue after your bath.

I want to remember how each night after Clue, we watch an episode of DC Cupcakes.  You discovered this show a few weeks ago when you were home sick for the day.  You saw it in my Netflix queue and watched one.  Then you watched all of season one and ever since we snuggle up each night and watch it together.

I want to remember you roller skating up and down the street with your sparkly pink headphones on listening to music.

I want to remember how your will has only gotten stronger.  You hold so tightly to what you think, feel and believe.  It is a challenge sometimes especially when obeying your parents is the opposite of your strong will.

I want to remember how you need new tennis shoes again.  Your feet have not grown, but you get holes everywhere so quickly.

I want to remember that your tennis coach just moved you up to the next level.  He wants to challenge you and get you playing points so you learn how to play a game of tennis.

I want to remember that you want your hair pulled back into a ponytail each day.  You know how to do it yourself, but it doesn’t get quite tight enough, so you still let me do it.

I want to remember how you wanted to talk to your cousin Kelli, so you got my phone and called her.  You talked for about 30 minutes and you were happy.  Sweetest.

I want to remember how hard you have been praying for your aunt and your cousins.  You don’t know the whole story, but you know they are hurting and you care.

I want to remember how I can tell what kind of day you had by how you walk through the field after school.  Running and alone is not a good sign.  Last one out of the school and slowly walking across the field laughing with friends is a good sign.  Luckily, you have very few bad days.

I want to remember how you eat non stop.  You are always hungry.  I am pretty sure you are hitting another growth spurt which is crazy because you will pass me up soon.  Your favorite is pears and mac & cheese.

I want to remember how you just started wearing deodorant and how we do a crazy putting on deodorant dance to make it fun.

I want to remember how bad your feet smell.  I put powder in your shoes each morning because if I don’t…pewwwwwwee.

I want to remember how you watched Dancing with the Stars with me and we both had the same favorites, Maks and Meryl.  We were excited when they won.  We just watch the dance and the judges reveal their scores because the opening package and the judges comments are (sometimes) inappropriate for your little self.

I want to remember how you like to ask meaningful questions at bedtime.  I used to think it was a stalling tactic, but I think it is just the time when your brain and body quiet down and you can think.  I love, super love, my favorite thing love, our conversations.

I want to remember your beautiful blue eyes, rosy cheeks, big teeth, freckles and yes, even your pimples.  They are you in this moment in time.  I love that face.  I love to soak it in.

I want to remember how each morning before you get out of the car to go to school you ask me, “is there anything on my face?”  My response is, “only beauty.”  Which makes you smile.

I want to remember how each night you say, “Good night, I love you, sweet dreams.”  Always followed by, “don’t forget to check on me.”  I’ll never forget.

I’ll never forget.

This moment in time is written on my heart.

Ramblings on this Mother’s Day

Your #1 Fan post on May 11th, 2014
Posted in Mother's Day, Novalie, Personal

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Can we just go back to the days where I was given a bouquet of rocks for Mother’s Day and I fell deeply more in love with my baby girl?  My favorite.

I am pretty selfish on Mother’s Day.  The other 364 days of the year, I want zero (and I mean zero) focus on myself.  I don’t like any attention drawn to myself for any reason.  But, Mother’s Day is all about me.   I want to be told that I am the best mother in the world.

All I ever wanted to be was a mother.  I went to college to make my dad happy and even then I majored in how to be a mother.  Six to nine was my number of kids with nine being what I really wanted.  I knew pretty early on in my marriage that I would not bear children.  It was a shock, but I think through the 18 years of marriage thus far, I have handled it with a pretty good attitude.  That doesn’t mean that sometimes the ache and pain is so deep, so raw, so gut wrenching painful that I cry ugly tears until I can’t breathe.  Because those moments happen.  And when they do, I just don’t think I can bear it, but I do and end up saying, “ok God, I trust you.”

Novalie came along seven years into our marriage.  She is mine because of a faithful woman acting as God’s instrument in this life.  Novalie was my daughter long before she came to this earth, God just had to be creative in having us find each other again.  I don’t say that to take away anything from her birth mother.  I just know she was to give Novalie life and I was to be her mother.  I will always love and be beyond grateful for the selfless love of her birth mother.

Novalie is now almost eleven.  The past eleven years, I have felt the pain of infertility more so than the first seven years because I know how much I love being a mother and I thought for sure I would get the chance to be a mother again and again.  There have been times that we have put all our energy, time and resources into adding to our family and the answer has always been no.  There have been times when I have just said, “I am here, I am willing, I will love any child you send my way,” and just live my life with that prayer in my heart.  When Novalie is feeling sad and lonely wishing for a sibling, I tell her to feel sad for a moment, but then go and don’t complain.  For whatever reason, this is His will for her life and for mine and it will do no good to feel sorry for yourself and think it is totally unfair.  (which it is, by the way)  It won’t change a thing, so be happy in this moment and don’t search for answers where there are no answers.

My passion in life is motherhood.  I have tried these past few years while Novalie goes to school all day to find a new passion.  I wish I could do crafts and sew all day.  I have tried.  It is not my passion.  I am so not a project person.  If I can’t do the project in a day, I don’t want anything to do with it.  A couple of the years, my days were consumed with service while I was in the Relief Society Presidency which was okay, but overwhelming for my personality.  I volunteer when I can at school.  I miss my friends which would take up my time during the week.  Nothing comes close to motherhood however.

I am always thinking and worrying about Novalie.  I want to get her and be present for her and be the best for her.  I often find myself fleeing to the library to raid the parenting section.  Right now, I am reading (again and again) “How to talk so teens will listen and how to listen so teens will talk.”  I also have, “The Five Love Languages for Teenagers” waiting for me.  I know Novalie is not a teenager yet, but man alive her behavior sure is sometimes.  I find those books more relatable than the children ones.  What I realize lately is that I need to be fleeing to the scriptures and prayer more often than the library.  Sure I say those often deep pleading prayers only a mother can understand, but I need to turn to it more.

Saturday Reading (17)

Even when she is crabby and I feel at odds with her, I can scoop her up, snuggle her, read with her and take silly photos with her.  Then, all is right again.

Saturday Reading (1)

I feel like I am constantly adjusting to new attitudes and behaviors with Novalie.  I find myself lately looking at her and thinking (sometimes saying), “you are 10 years old, act like it!”  Then later when I reflect back on it, I feel sad and want to go back and change my thinking to….”you are ONLY 10 years old, you are still learning.”  The last couple of months have been a roller coaster of emotions of sweetness and awesomeness mixed with raging hormone moodiness.  I am constantly trying to figure her out and be what she needs when she needs it.  I often fail miserably, thank goodness for forgiveness!  I am trying to be the best mother I can be for her and it never leaves my mind.  I don’t just go about life being her mother, I consciously go about life being her mother.  My passion is being her mother.

So, on this day, Mother’s Day, I want her to tell me how fabulous I am.  And she did.  She wrote me a sweet letter which is tucked into my heart forever (which is too sacred to share).

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Her awesome artwork.

Mother’s Day!

Mother’s Day!

It’s time to say,

Hey!

I care,

You care,

We share!

Time to have a time for fun,

With SUN!

Mother’s Day!

Poem by Novalie.  She knows me well to add “with SUN!”

church

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Trying to get her to hold still for a picture.  I was unsuccessful.

Despite her complaining that I made pancakes for breakfast instead of biscuits and gravy (the norm for a Sunday morning) and despite having a hissy fit about going to church (well, your dad and I are going to take the sacrament, feel the spirit and learn about Jesus…if you want to come you know where your clothes are and where the church is, you can find us…ha!….take that for mothering!)  it was a good Mother’s Day because I got to hear how awesome I am.  One of my favorite things….being told that I am only sort of wise because I don’t get 5th grade math.  WHO DOES?

~Happy Mother’s Day~

Hip Hop Competition

Your #1 Fan post on May 6th, 2014
Posted in Hip Hop, Novalie

hip hop

Novalie has been working hard, having fun and learning more about dance during this school year.  Her team competes in one competition a year.  They are just a beginning group who are there for fun, not super serious dancers and Novalie loves it.  It was a small group this year, just 5 of them and all the different ages and different body types made me think of the misfit toys.  I love it.  Novalie was super duper nervous.  Even with how nervous she was, her teammate was even more nervous.  She was feeling sick with nervousness and didn’t think she could do it.  Right up until the moment they went on, there was Novalie calming her down, saying encouraging and motivating things.  I love when I see the kindness and goodness in Novalie’s heart shine through.

hip hop1

Their dance teacher entered them into the intermediate category which we were confused about and made them even more nervous.  But, they got on stage and did such a great job!  When Novalie practices at home or during dance class, she is pretty mellow.  Once she got on stage, she transformed into such a big performer.  Her facial expressions were amazing.  She always amazes me and I am so proud of her.  She is brave, kind, aware of others and a fun girl.  Hip hop brings out all those qualities.

hip hop2

Easter Weekend 2014

Your #1 Fan post on May 5th, 2014
Posted in Easter, Family, Novalie, Traditions

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Novalie and her friend at our pool’s Easter egg dive.  Novalie did this last year and loved it, so we signed up again.  It is a fun and different way to do an egg hunt.  Her prize was a braided blue hair strip which she has worn every day since.  It cracks me up…  a blue strip phase.

watereggs

They swam for a couple of hours after.

park

It was a beautiful spring day and they still had energy left after swimming for 2 parks!

Easterbasket

Easter basket.  🙂

coloringeggs

We started off Easter Sunday with finishing up our resurrection eggs with our empty egg.  It is a great way to cover the Easter story for kids.  After, we dyed and painted eggs.

paintingeggs

eggs

myeggs

eggsblue

Novalie made fun of my blue egg, but I thought it looked cool.

I did not get a picture of Novalie in her pretty Easter dress because she had a bad case of the crankies before church.  Bad case.  And then after church, she changed out of her dress before I even got out of the car.  She mellowed out during sacrament and apologized many times for her behavior.

egghunt

In the late afternoon, Kevin and I spent some time hiding Easter eggs and then she was off on her egg hunt.

goldenegg

Finding the golden egg!

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~Happy Easter~